Improving Mealtimes for Children on the Autism Spectrum

Helping children to eat a balanced meal is often difficult for many parents. Parents with children on the spectrum find that feeding their children nutritious meals is one of the biggest challenges and dinner time sounds like War War 3.

Some children limit what they eat to the extent that it could just be chicken nuggets.  This can result in the child experiencing severe nutritional deficiencies. This can lead to problems like aggression, weight loss, malnutrition, growth problems and often diabetes.

What can be done? If you find that mealtime is more of a battleground than a bonding time, then techniques this article you might want to consider.

Take Notes of the Areas where your child struggle

Make a comprehensive list of foods that your child absolutely will not eat. 

Try to document: They will not eat.

• where you were.
• the time of day.
• how the food was presented.
• what happened. (What was the reaction?)

This will help to spot and identify their eating patterns and what you can be changed. AT mealtime give the child a new food item introduced with an item they like. Give positive reinforcement for trying foods let them know one bit is enough. Just try.

Positive Reinforcements 

While you continue to serve them foods your children are familiar with, try introducing new foods along with these. They may have to work their way up to the new item but rewarding the behavior with positive reinforcement is strongly encouraged. Some children love verbal praise and some love edible praise. 

For example, if your child is struggling with broccoli but manages to take a few small bites, a piece of their favorite candy could be provided. A personal favorite in our household is using M&M’s as a reward.

Then we found out a group of children like to take shots. What I mean is that little medicine cap used to give children either their Benadryl or cough meds. They are great little shot glasses and I filled them up with Kool-Aid. This turned out to be the best in getting them to finish their meals. Cue words are, “take a bite, take a shot” This caught on and we slowly pulled back the shots and now they eat to get the natual reward of desert. 

The goal is to have the food in question become its own reinforcer. Once the child realizes that the unfamiliar food is good and it becomes familiar, they begin to enjoy it. 

Another variation of this could be during breakfast times. If your child enjoys waffles or pancakes for breakfast, continue to serve him these foods, but make it a point to add a bowl of fruit on the side. For each piece of fruit that is eaten, then they get a bite of waffles or pancakes. As they eat, be sure to commend and encourage them. This will take hands on parents, and it will require patients. However, it does work!

Modifying and Substituting Foods 

Many people in the autism community say’s it the textures, that’s why my child only eats chicken nuggets.  While we may simply find some textures unpleasant, these same textures could be impossible for your child to overcome. Remember to be flexible in this area of your food management. Sometimes, no matter how much you plead with them, some foods are best written off. 

With the number of foods, we have available, play around with different combinations. For example, if a typical Caesar salad is a definite no in your household, why not try a broccoli salad? If they don’t seem to like chicken, try swapping it out for catfish or salmon. 

Play with food 

Chopped and moist foods seem to go over well with even the pickiest of eaters. Give mashed potatoes with ranch and bacon bits or cook a ham with a brown sugar glaze and why can’t we serve ranch or cheese over broccoli? Try to broaden their horizons.  

It may even be beneficial to try frozen foods. One mom found that frozen peas were a success in her household as a snack. Peas are small and can be eaten as finger food, making them fun to eat for children.

It may not be the flavor your child is averse to, only the fact that obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) comes with autism and sometimes they feel they have to chew their food forever before swallowing.  I suggest that you try chopping foods smaller with smaller portions or blending certain foods to change the texture they dislike. Or eliminate this completely by hiding it in something they already like. 

There are so many different ways to cook fruits and vegetables.  For example, if they dislike the squishiness of blueberries, offer smoothies instead or cook them into a compote that can be served along with a neutral food. 

Model the Desired Behavior 

We need to din together! When your child sits together with both parents and siblings at a dining table. This is the best model of behavior your child learns to imitate. 

Sit down, talk, ask how everyone’s day was and at a reasonable pace, finish the food on your plate. Shower them with praise when improvements are shown, everyone at the table can contribute. Use words like please pass the plate or thank you for getting me more milk. Be dramatic sometimes and say, “mm good! I love this chicken!” “it’s my favorite!” then ask the child what their favorite food is. Remember all children are sponges with autism or not.

Don’t Reinforce Bad Behavior 

This is the flip side of the previous tip. Many children on the spectrum struggle to communicate and may feel that throwing a tantrum is their best option. No matter how loud it gets, or how ruff it gets, let them walk away. Kids will not starve. However, they don’t get their reward either.

One of our children loved iPad. If he didn’t eat his dinner, then no iPad. 9 out of 10 times he comes back and eats dinner to get his iPad.  This is a long way from him taking a “Bite for a shot”.

Ignore the undesirable, such as throwing food or spitting. No eye contact mom! No surprise face when they dumb their food onto the ground. Just quietly pick up their plate with no eye contact and let them know in a calm voice, they need to leave the table if they are not going to eat. 

I am also a parent and I have had serval children come through my house and this program works. However, Its hard! We have support group on Facebook group at #autismarmy.   I want to let you know… It does get easier! And it does happen quickly. As soon as your child knows you mean business. Then it works. Thats why people always say start good eating habits when they are young. When they get bigger… believe me their tantrums become demolition destruction to your home. 

Encourage Communication Through Choices 

Children who struggle with verbalizing need tools to help with communicate their likes and dislikes. 

By using Pecs to show pictures of food you can have them plan out a meal to prepare. Always making sure they pick all 4 food groups. For example, they pick chicken nuggets, now have them pick the vegetable or a salad. Don’t forget to have them pick their reward after dinner either a cookie, ice-cream or popcorn. Parents need to stick to the program!  Please don’t give in and let the child have their reward before they finish their dinner. Once the child knows you mean business the tantrums will become fewer and fewer until dinner finally becomes that bonding time instead of War time.

Teaching sign language to your child can assist with them communicating their needs and wants. Sign Language is a great thing to teach all children as early as possible. It will enhance their abilities in communication and reduces their anxiety.   

 Visual charts are great!  Display what you’re having for dinner along with what time dinner will be served. By allocating your child a sense of control and letting them know what to expect, their mealtime anxiety is reduced.

To recap:

• Make a list of foods you would like to implement 

• Offer rewards to encourage eating (Positive Reinforcments)

• Be opened to changing textures to make food more appealing 

• Clearly model the desired behavior 

• Reward good behavior and ignore less desirable behavior

• Encourage them to communicate by providing choices 

The most important thing to remember as a parent be consistence, always be positive and keep it fun and you will succeed.